Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
