Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
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Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
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Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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