bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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