Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize