yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
