Is it normal to miss your booty call?
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
