how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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