If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
