i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
