Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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