Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
