Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Come on in and take your pants off
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize