I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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