she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Dignity is for republicans.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
