I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
