I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
