At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
