discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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