I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
PANTIES FOUND
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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