he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize