Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
