Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
