would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize