Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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