If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
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