I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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