I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
foreskin is a definite game changer
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
