I think i peed on brittanys purse
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
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