why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
