she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
