with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
