how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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