Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
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