So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
