She's JV to your varsity
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Everything about him screamed your future.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
