38 yer olds are good kisserssss
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
