I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
kristin has been a bad kristin
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize