he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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