I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
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I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize