My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
