Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
