sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
handjob tips. give me some.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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