he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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