I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
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