i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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