your parents love me but you hate me
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
