is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
