When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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