margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize