she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I did not marry a roomba.
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